Back to the Horrible Limbo

[unforth]

I've been suspecting for about a week that my unreasonable stress levels (I feel far more stressed out than my current level of commitment warrants) were linked to the limbo of waiting to find out when I can start sending out my resume or looking for a home in Boston. Now I know it's the case. My superior at work as decided to decline the job at the Smithsonian because it's not going to pay enough. I found this out about an hour ago, and have had horrible stressed out stomach ache ever since, because this effectively kicks the shit out the only little window of stability I had found in the horrible limbo. Fucking NBSS. Just send out the goddamn letters already so I can move on with my fucking life!!! Aaargh!

I've found that there are two kinds of stressed out. One is where you realize you have a ton to do, so you knuckle down and just do it one thing at a time; the other is where you realize that you have a ton to do, but it's just all so overwhelming that you can't even conceive of where to start so you sit and stew and it gets worse and worse and cycles out of control. I hate feeling the second way, and I do right now, and it sucks. I just want to KNOW so I can start on what I have to do next!! Goddamn it!! :(

I'm not as bad off as I sound. I just needed to rant. Sorry everyone. :)

Comments

[sapphohestia.livejournal.com]

Sorry for all the uncertainty. Can you contact Boston for an update?

[unforth.livejournal.com]

Not really. They told me when to expect to hear back from them; until that date has passed I don't feel at all justified in getting in touch with them, and that's still about two weeks from now...maybe more like 3...